Tuesday, April 21, 2009


FOR THIS SHIT, BYE FOREVER. hahaahhahaaaaa
or maybe not, shit idk .. not gonna update for awhile, my life is way to busy for this alreadddddy, seriously.

OH AND HAPPY 1MONTH SL21'S! ( chelsy ridge adrian and rachel )
This is what I love, and can't stop lovin'.
Get wasted at partys, from 9 till 7 in the morning.
I live for the music, rollin' blunts, feelin' high, gettin' loaded
- or take some pills and go to La La Land.
Spendin' all my money on dope and extreme high price tickets.
But in the end, it's all worth it.
I like to live in my own world. Fuck regular life! Fuck the '9-to-5' job!
I'm totally enjoyin' every moment, every hour, every minute.
Thats what I do at fridays and saturdays. Why should I take life so seriously?
I just want to do, what I like to do! Be far from reality, 'cause I can't stand society!
It's my own world, I just want to hear the music.

I think the whole system fucking sucks.
everybody's working their fucking ass up during the week,
getting totally fucking stressed out - So what's wrong, and what's right?
I live for the weekend. - dj showtek. hahahahahaha! so interesting.
and no i dont live like that. stupids. lmfao!

;( i remember this quote helped us get over our past relationship
and it helped us "move on" to eachother and start a new one.
.. wayyyyyy back then. holy shit.

but now, i gotta use this quote to help MYSELF get over you.

Wednesday, April 15, 2009

life in the faaaast ass muthafucken lane.

TRY AND CATCH ME, nothings holding me back anymore
i see more oppurtunities out there, im having fun, im living it up.
despite the fact that i still miss you, im doing just fine.

today, was a regular school day, same shit diff. day!
first started off with HSA testing, wasn't that bad, to me it wassss pretty darn easy.
finished my test, and me and jas took pictures on her new DSi.
fuck i wannttttt one, its hella fun!
and then after, it was lunch, talked stories, blah blah blah
my mom brought me food from mcd's, thank god! i was sooo hungry!
third period, char didn't come! stuuuupid.
i was SO BORED, so i fell asleep for the rest of the class
it felt so damnnnn good ;]
and in fourth period, i ACTUALLY DID MY WORK, with some help from will- i - am.
it's cool his name can be mixed up, will- i - am, i- am -will, wil- am - i, am- i -will. but then theres .. i- will - am, and that just doesn't make any sense. hahahaaa.
well gona head to bed early, HSA TESTING AGAIN TOMORROW.
boy .. i can't wait for the weekend, take a break off this stupid test.
ppppppppppaaaaarrrrrrttttttyyyyyyyyyy's! + chelsy comes back tomorrow! :D yay hahaaaa OH N HAPPPY BIRTHDAY CHELS.

" It's like me and you didn't even try, we just said goodbye, we let this love here die. And never looked back, In my mind, I'm still questioning why, Promises turn to lies, Feelings bottled inside. When the truth be told I... I'm still wondering, What if?
What if? What if, we would've worked out I believe we could've worked out If we worked a little harder " - What if -Brutha.

Monday, April 13, 2009


that i keep learning over, and over again.
sick & tired of it, it doesn't phase me at all anymore
over and done with, thank god.

Saturday, April 11, 2009

Nothing more, Nothing less

Lifes going great for me<3
and i'm perfectly fine where i'm at.

chan: " i noticed that eversince .. i see life in a whole new positive way! " hahahaa, damn right.
well heres some pictures from Kandy Karnival/april's birthday!
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Thursday, April 9, 2009


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I ADMIT I CHEATED, don't know why i did it but i do regret it
nothing that i can do or say can change it, come back ..

my curiosty got the better of me.

im not giving up, never did & never will
we didn't even try one bit to make our relationship work out, we just let everything we had simply fade

9 long months without you, and 1yr and 1month with you down the drain ..
w/without you, beleive me I AM happy im pretty satisfied with life, but i know that it would be a whole lot better with you by my side.

after all this time, i still keep asking myself .. why do i still care for you this much.

.. ew this blog is so fucken emotional, but whatfuckkken ever, im just saying straight up how i feel.

Tuesday, April 7, 2009


lucky charms! :O WTF?!?! and i ain't getting any better, seriously.
my nose is all stuffy, my throat is killing me! and i feel so fricken cold to the world, hawwwww! being at home is so not a option for me, i wanna get outa here, i swear if i could drive .. id be gone and never ever be home! i keep telling myself im gona get my permit .. and then go drivers ed, then go for my license, but damn i'm so damn lazy. sad, sad, sad. ONE DAY i will, i know it, i beleive in myself .. hahahahaa, sure .. :P i already know how to drive pretty well, but standard .. a whole nother fucken story .. seriously, i suck! haha i always fricken die out! hm .. i want a job to tryna be more damn independent i need money, to support my habits, and shoppppping! :D

i am fucken badass

like that superhero guy dad thing, in the movie taken ;]
likkkke i don't even know .. watching that movie today, made me and danielle feel so cool! omg so fucken lame, shut up already. hahhaha
yeah .. back to ugly reality today, sickening.
got to school LATE as always, i never do go on time.
sat in first period, just staring .. it felt weird to be back there again.
second period .. i don't know, it was boring, talked stories, same with lunch.
third period, walked with char, and we just talked with arlex branden and tracy? idk the erking guy .. haha.
thank god char's in my class, or i think i would just fucken die already :P
fourth, talked with chanelll, and yeah i noticed i did alot of talking today.
afterschool, went to danielle's house, watched movies, ate saimin, usual.
okay, i gotta do my history project .. it's already 11:28pm.
ohhhhhh no, its gona be a long night ;(

Sunday, April 5, 2009

last saturday

of spppppring break, was the " off the shit " noli said, hahahahaa!
walked to chas's house, waited for noli to pick us up
then went to pearls to meet up w/char, then lex picked us up
and we went to janeeeen's, it was fucken cooorazeh! in there .. haha
after, we went to the shop .. i don't even remember how we got there .. seriously. lmao!
got inside .. ew it was so hot, and sweaty, and ewwwwwwwww wtf.
so me chas n char and ridge just went outside and stayed in the cars
then mostly everyone else came outside, and we just cruised and stuff.
after, i sobered up, and then it was boring, so then lex took me home.
ew, one more day .. then fucken back to REALITY -_- i hate school.
heres pictures!
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.. yesterday woulda shoulda coulda been, 1 year and eight months.
haw, where are you now dayyyyyyyyys ;(

Friday, April 3, 2009

theres this

one guy right .. that i haven't forgotten eversince day one.
the one that i kept in the back of my mind every single day,
the one that i still think about from time to time, and wonder how hes doing now.
out of every single guy i had something with, i still kept you in mind.
its not i miss what we had, its i miss you.

if only if only, is what i keep telling myself.
shit .. if i really did learn from my mistakes, i would be a fucken genious rigggght now!!!! hahaaha.

BLAH BLAH BLAH -_- whatevvvvvva.
anyways, today was allright, spent a night w/crystal :D
she picked me up, went out to eat geinki's, thanks for the treat!
then went to target, talked stories, then dropped me off.

Thursday, April 2, 2009

wasted day

of my spring break, me and chels woke up around 12 almost 1.
attte foood! then just sat in my room for over 4 hours -_- omg!
decided to get ready, then met up with brandy chantyle jas danielle noli geraldine ryan and jeremy at geinki's.
ate :D and talked the shitload of storys! funnny asss shit!
then after, waited around for adrian, but he couldnt go out ;(
so i ended up just going home, so fricken gayyyyy to the world.
but it was nice catchin up with everyone again ;] sober fun, and talks about when we aren't sober! hahahahaa.
yesterday, i met up with chels at pearls.
then we went to her house, and waited around for plans
sister picked us up, and we went to crestview, cruise around with ridge nd rozzner them.
movie night at ridges house, watched hair extensions.
i was trippppppppin! then got ride from lex home.

the other day, i waited around my house most of the day
adrian picked me up, and we just went drivinn' around everywhere with chels rachel and anthony, yup.

your getttttting out of my mind slowly, im fricken forcing myself!
the shit i keep hearing about you .. just completely changed my feelings towards you.
it makes me sick to my stomach, i tell ya.
i want a guy as SWEET, as his WORDS.
cause lately, i noticed every guy will say what you wanna hear.
sick of the sweettalkin', with nothin to back it up
big dissapointment.